Seeing as we’re nearing December, the month of outrageous gift-giving, it’s only natural I’ve been crafting my ass off making gifts. As usual, the knitting needles are clicking away at a rate that is beyond human, and yet still somehow not fast enough. And with the dreadful problem of not actually being able to talk about what I’m making without RUINING ALL THE OF THE SURPRISES!!!!!!11!!!!!
I’ve made 4/10 (or 2/5ths, math nerds) hats for the school crowd. These are the least secretive of all the gifts as I’d be shocked to learn my 10-year-old students are reading my blog. But hey, weirder things have happened. Unfortunately, too lazy to pull up pictures of my progress.
The current bane of my existence is The Scarf. I’ve officially been knitting it for a week. It’s 100% garter stitch (this means hella boring to you non-knitting folk). Granted, it’s got some fancy color blocks and some modular construction. But it’s still garter stitch. And it’s kicking my ass. Though somehow during this week, it’s grown to almost six feet long and nearly a foot wide. At this point, I feel like the dreaded Doctor Who Scarf would be totes easy. This damn scarf has colors blacks anywhere from 2 to 120 rows big. With as few as 24 and as many as 400 stitches per row. It’s dreadful. And even watching 10 episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation (shut up, I’ll watch what I want) was not enough to get the damn thing finished.
More frustrating? I can’t even post pictures of my progress because there is a slim slim slim chance the recipient could read this infernal blog and spoil the magic of a surprise gift. All I can say is my sister better be serious when she says she’s in love. Otherwise I’ll want this stupid thing back. Maybe. Probably not, actually. My guess is I’ll never want to look at the thing ever again once it’s done. Which is a shame, because it really is sharp.